Title: They Come to Eat our Green T-Shirts and Not Give us Milk
Sequel to Steak and Potatoes
Author: Bernadette
Rating: PG
Fandom: Psych
Genre: Humour, Angst, H/C 
Summary: At first, Lassiter thinks their newest case is a joke but when a childhood fear rears its ugly head, the case becomes deadly serious.
Main Characters: Lassiter, O'Hara, Spencer, Gus and Vick.
Disclaimers: All things Psych owned by Steve Franks and the USA network, although I am devising a secret plan to take over the network and Franks. 
Beta: The always encouraging texasartchickand my always most wonderful comma wrangling-ninja-meh monkey-whacking-spyentist virtual spouse winks7985
Note: My intention was to write a short story but while doing some research on the internet, I came across a very small tidbit of information that gave me an idea for a plot that would require a much longer story. Now, I don't know if this bit of information is true - I was unable to find any other sites that gave me the same information - but if it was true, then the world is a very strange place.
Spoilers: For my story Steak and Potatoes. You really should read it before reading this one, if you haven't read it yet that is.
Word Count: This part: 3,267
Status: WIP!

Huge thanks to:

tpena19: (My Evil Master - yes, I am her minion!) Who gave me a lot of helpful information about cows. To quote tpena19: 'My grandparents live on a ranch (where I currently live now) so I grew up around the tricksy things. lorency for the title of this story and the 'I hate cows' icon which is my all time favourite icon ... evah!
tygermama, sparrowwritings, winks7985 for always being there and encouraging me with the, 'whoots', 'yays' and 'go! go! og!'s" You guys rock and I love you all!
texasartchickfor helping me to put the 'fun' back into my writing.
And to Silverluna and vampkira for inspiring me with every word they write!




( They Come to Eat Our Green T-Shirts and Not Give us Milk - Part One )

 

 

I'm going to start posting WIP's.

Why? Because I have kicked my writer's block up the arse! The toe of my foot is lodge firmly in it's butt and I'm slamming it against the wall. It's not happy and about damn time too because it had been making me unhappy for a long time. The shoe is on the other foot, or should I say, in the other's arse!

I'm writing every day. 300-500 words a day. It may not seem like much to some, but to me it's a lot. And because I'm writing every day, the word count will get higher, because writing will become a habit.

Writer's Block? I laugh in it's face .... ha ha ha!

As for Egor ... I bought him a sausage - he can't tell the difference. He thinks it's a penis. He's trying to figure out how to put it on - imagine a short twat running around with a sausage sticking out of his butt ....

I could survive for 1 minute, 47 seconds chained to a bunk bed with a velociraptor

Okay! So I lied. But seriously, as if I would get attacked by a Velociraptor.

Time goes by so fast these days ....

3 months ago this Tuesday, I had to put my dog down.

Yesterday was the first day I didn't get upset and teary-eyed when thinking about her. I'm finally getting there-I hope.

Today, I actually had the tinest urge to write Mag7 fic. I feel that I do want to write more stories in this AU. This still may be a while yet, but at least I'm pretty sure that one day, I will get back to it.

Now, if only my fucking-wanking-tossing-twat of a muse would fucking work! Squeezing his balls doesn't seem to work anymore .....

For tvcharacters100Challenge

Batch No.2

40/100 x Carlton Lassiter - 'Psych'

Credit if snagging ...
Textless icons are not bases. 
Screencaps snagged from burgundy_shoes


Teasers:

           


( Beware of Gun Porn ..... that's all I'm saying )

For tvcharacters100Challenge

Batch No.1

20/100 x Carlton Lassiter - 'Psych'

Credit if snagging ...
Textless icons are not bases.
Some Screencaps snagged from burgundy_shoes


Teasers:

             


( Icons under the cut thingy ..... )

In a massive attempt to distract myself while my dog was going through what she was going through .... I made icons of Timothy Omundson's characters in 'Jericho' and 'Deadwood'.

20 x Phil Constantino - 'Jericho'
20 x Brom Garret - 'Deadwood'



Credit if snagging ... 
Textless icons are not bases.

It saddens me and guilts me to say that over the past month - since my dog died - I have lost all interest in 'The Magnificent Seven' fandom (I've actually lost interest in a of things). I don't want to write Mag7 fic. I don't want to read Mag7 fic. And if I'm really honest, I don't want anything to do with the Mag7 fandom. I could say that this is because I had named my dog Ezra, but that would feel more like an excuse than a reason.

I'm hoping that this will change in the future because I have promised fics to some people and I don't want to let them down, but at this point I don't see it happening.

And that means no continuation of  'A Murder Spree' and that actually pisses me off, but I'm not going to force myself to write in a fandom that at the moment, I have no interest in. It will bring on the writer's block and stop me writing.

lorency, I apologise to you. I know I have promised you a story. I hope that one day I can write it for you.

I apologise to everyone who was looking forward to 'A Murder Spree' and any other fics that I had planned to write. It makes me feel bad because I hate to dissapoint people.

Below is a list of plots that I want to write. And the problem is, I'm excited about all of them but my brain can't decide on which one to write first. So if you could vote for me, tell me which one you want to read. I will then put them in order as to how many votes they get and then write them in that order.

Thank you :)



( My brain is stirred and the plot thickens .... )

Snagged from lipstickcat 

❶ Choose an episode of anime or television series you have on your computer. Make sure you're certain you want that one, you cannot change your mind once you skip this step. DO NOT TELL YOUR FLIST WHAT YOU CHOSE.
❷ Make note of how long the episode is here -> 19:58
❸ Ask your flist to choose a time between 00:00 and whatever the length of your episode is. Be specific, (ie: 19:11, 21:09, 02:42)
❹ Make them an icon using THAT FRAME ONLY no matter what it is. And remember, you can only use that ONE episode you chose previous, even if the person posting isn't familiar with it.


ETA:


         

 

Again I'm trying something completely different to what I normally do.

Please credit if you're snagging ....




Teasers:


       



( No. 10 is my favourite ..... *blink* )

Title: Tea for Three ... Plus One
Author: Bernadette
Rating: PG
Fandom: Psych
Genre: It started out as an attempt at humor but soon turned to a little bit of H/C. Actually more H than C.
Summary: Sixty seven year old women who attempt to grope younger men, should not be trusted.
Main Characters: Detective’s Lassiter and O'Hara plus a couple of OC's.
Disclaimers: All things Psych owned by Steve Franks and the USA network, although I am devising a secret plan to take over the network and Franks.
Beta: The always wonderful and awesome George (strangevisitor7) and my wonderful comma wrangling-ninja-meh monkey-whacking-spyentist virtual spouse winks7985
Notes: As part of my ficlets100 challenge. Original table can be found here.
Prompt: No. 87 - Tea
Spoilers: None.
Word Count: 3,297 (still can't call it a ficlet).


( Tea and biscuits and perhaps a little ..... groping? )

More icons of - yes, you guessed correctly - Carlton Lassiter.

This time it's something completely different. I tried to experiment with them and do something I've finally gotten the hang of and I'm happy with the result but I'm not sure anyone else will like them.

If you do like them, let me know!

Snaggable as always ....  :)


Teasers:


           


( ..... very little gun porn below the cut..... )

Yeah, I know what you're thinking. I'm thinking it too.

10 hurt/comfort Table: Do-It-Yourself

 

001 Headache/Migraine	002 Drugged	003 Collapse/Fainting	004 Captured/Trapped	005 Unconscious
001	002	003	004	005
006 Fever	007 Graveyard	008 Waiting room	009 Blood	010 Missing
006	007	008	009	010

0/10 Complete

Admit it! You knew they were coming ;)

I even managed not to do a lot of Lassiter Gun Porn - just a lot of Lassiter ...

I also had the intention of including all characters, but I ended up being distracted by the pretty that is Carlton Lassiter - although I know most of you don't consider him to be as hunky as I do ...



Samples:


           



( Carlton Lassiter icons ........ *blink* )

Title: Doorknobs are People too
Author: Bernadette
Rating: PG
Fandom: Psych
Genre: Hurt/Comfort
Summary: Some doors shouldn't be kicked ...
Main Characters: Lassiter, O’Hara, Spencer and Gus.
Disclaimers: All things Psych owned by Steve Franks and the USA network, although I am devising a secret plan to take over the network and Franks.
Beta: My always wonderful and awesome soul sister George (strangevisitor7) who made this a better story and my wonderful comma wrangling-ninja-meh monkey-whacking-spyentist virtual spouse winks7985.
Notes: As part of my ficlets100 challenge. Original table can be found here.
Prompt: No. 20 - Doorknob
Spoilers: Set in season 3 but with no spoilers.
Word Count: 3,029 - still can't call it a ficlet.


( Doorknobs are People too ... that's why they shouldn't be kicked )

At George's (strangevisitor7) suggestion, I have created a separate LJ - Egor's Fic Dungeon (LJ named by tygermama) - to archive all my old stories + new stories as they are written.

I'll start archiving soon - have the rest of the year to do it. The awesome George has also offered to help!

Pepper (conjured_1) did it, so I thought why not - took a bit of thought though.

Please note: I WILL continue to post new stories here! 

Also note: Being threatened with a Shillelagh whacking is a great motivator!

Title: Steak and Potatoes
Author: Bernadette
Rating: PG
Fandom: Psych
Genre: Humor
Summary: Do you think it's possible cows could be dangerous, seriously dangerous, possibly evil?
Main Characters: Detective Carlton Lassiter, Chief Karen Vick, Shawn Spencer, and Burton Guster.
Disclaimers: All things Psych owned by Steve Franks and the USA network, although I am devising a secret plan to take over the network and Franks.
Beta: The always wonderful and awesome George (strangevisitor7) and my wonderful comma wrangling-ninja-whacking-spyentist virtual spouse winks7985.
Notes: As part of my ficlets100 challenge. Original table can be found here. Prompt: No. 73 – cows
I've been watching the Psych ep 'Ghosts' way to much - this is the result.
Please note: Only one cow was harmed in this story. It is now being enjoyed by a group of men (who don't eat quiche) with a side dish of potatoes.
Also note: That I sacrificed two days of watching Pysch to write this. Lassiter, who is a very distracting influence, keeps my eyes glued to the tv rather than an empty word document. I listened to 'War of the Worlds' instead.
Another note: I wrote something! Writer's block be gone! I have broken you like a bad back, well almost. The first 3/4 of this story was fun, the last 1/4 was a struggle. *sigh*
Last note: This header is a story in itself :)
Spoilers: None. Well maybe the ep 'Ghosts' but that's going to depend on whether I mention cats or not. I didn't mention cats so no spoilers.
Word Count: 1,140 - it's not under 1,000 words so I can't really call it a ficlet.


( Steak and Potatoes .... and perhaps a manly scream )

Snagged from many awesome people!

Check the bands you've HEARD OF. Not just the ones you like.
Be honest people! If you really have never heard of them, don't mark it. It just makes you look fake.



( Not so much it seems..... )

sparrowwritings made me my very own Lassiter Gun Porn icon to use as my default user pic. She is ♥ for doing this!

Please don't snag :)

More awesomeness from my flist!

You guys are ♥